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Thursday, August 1, 2013

Friendship 4


When I see this word I have mixed reactions because I've had some really amazing and really awful experiences when it comes to friends

I find it hard to write about because it is difficult to put into words the feelings that I have.
I also don't want to offend anyone by writing about this.  Who knows if they read this blog - most likely not - but if they do, I want to protect their feelings as well.

I have 2 best friends that I've had for my entire life.  We were babies together, went to preschool through high school together - and two of us even went to the same college.  

Dress up time for the three of us - I talked about Sarah here
These are two people that I know will always be my friends.  If we don't talk for a year, and see each other again, it will be like time hasn't really passed and we have the same relationship as we always have...amazing and lifelong.  I would do anything for these two, and I am pretty sure they would do the same.

Sarah and me
Hollie and me in preschool

Heck - Hollie even promised to give me her second million dollars she earned (this was promised in her car while driving around our home town in high school)...yes, I still remember!

Since I've become an adult I've found it harder and harder to find friends that are true, honest and good people.

I've had a lot of friends that I thought were all of the qualities that I listed above and it turns out that it was all just a false hope. 

It seems like somewhere along the lines of the friendships things just stop...for reasons I don't even know.  Contact abruptly ends, no more phone calls, texting, random updates...almost as if the friendship never existed or meant anything in the first place.

I am ok with this with some relationships, but others have truly hurt my heart and my faith in having long lasting, meaningful friendships. 
I am too trusting and love way too easily and because of this I end up getting hurt.

I can't help but think it is something I do in these "friendships" to ruin it. 

When I reflect back I think; maybe I was too needy and selfish.  Maybe I didn't realize when they needed a friend the most or maybe I'm just not as fun as I think I am. 

All of these things I'm positive have a ring of the truth to them.
Since I've realized this, I've tried to consciously make an effort with everyone new I meet to be the type of person I want to be friends with. 
It isn't all about me - it is all about them, us and our friendship.  I try to be conscious of what the other person needs most and I try to help fulfill that.  I am trying to be a better person and friend.

The friendships that haven't lasted have taught me a lot, and for that I am grateful. 
I still get sad thinking about the, but I must look on the positive side and learn from them.

I am grateful for the friendships I carry with me from childhood.
I am grateful for the friends I have made throughout my adult life.
I am grateful for the new friendships that I have just started to create  

These are the ones I need to nurture and treasure...and I will make sure I do!


  1. OH hey, that's me up there. And walter. :)

  2. Awesome post. I lost my best friend of over 13 years two years ago...and it still hurts a lot today. I never had closure as to what I did to deserve to just be cut off one day. But you are very right, we all learn and grow from any relationship that we have. Some people are just for a season, and others are forever.

  3. Friendship is a two-way street, as they say. Maybe you weren't needy and selfish. Maybe it was actually the friends who were the problem. A girl I had known for twelve years did something to me that I would never expect...and I don't regret ending my friendship with her. Sometimes people change and they aren't meant to be in all chapters of our lives.

  4. I really love this post. I have definitely had my fair share of ups and downs in friendships.

    There is one that I thought would be there forever- and this is the person that ended up making me cry on my wedding day!! Obviously, I don't regret that friendship being over, but it doesn't stop me from being sad about it sometimes!


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